ARGH LET ME TELL YOU A THING.

I saw this little article about “10 Reasons Why Frozen is the most modern disney movie” or something blahblahblah, and reason number one was that Elsa’s parents were abusive.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

noooooooooo. no no no no no.

FROLLO was abusive. MOTHER GOTHEL WAS ABUSIVE.

Elsa’s parents did their darn best to make sure none of their daughters got hurt. Her dad didn’t know how to handle ice powers! He didn’t have ice powers! Nobody else had ice powers! No! All he knew was that Elsa had to learn to control her powers, and he did his darn best to help her. Maybe he didn’t go about it correctly. Maybe he accidentally contributed to her anxiety issues. MAYBE HE MESSED HER UP.

But it wasn’t on purpose. 

Look at this man. Look how much he cares for his daughter. He’s not afraid to touch her. He’s not afraid to hold her. He gave her the gloves FOR HER OWN PROTECTION, and Elsa turned them into a prison because she was afraid of herself. 

This movie is fascinating, not because it showed abusive parents, but because it showed LOVING, WELL MEANING, ADORABLE parents trying to help their daughter in the best way they could. Even if they did it wrong. Even if they didn’t have all the answers. They TRIED.

And that’s the saddest part. Because sometimes, even when parents try their best, they can still mess their kids up. It’s reality. But I don’t think Elsa ever blamed him for trying. 

Sure, Frollo was abusive (and visited Quasimodo every day, and presumably got him materials to build his dioramas, and taught him to read).  Yeah, Mother Gothel was abusive (and knew Rapunzel’s favorite foods and made them for her, and helped her cultivate hobbies to pass the time in the tower, and often traveled days on end to find Rapunzel the things she needed to make special paint colors for her murals).

Here’s the thing:  people are complex.  Bad people can sometimes commit (unnecessarily, unintentionally, unfoundedly) good acts, and good people can (accidentally, desperately, or even maliciously) do really bad things.  Sometimes people aren’t either good or bad — they’re just people, they’re faceted, they’re flawed.

Were Elsa’s parents bad people?  I don’t really think they were, no, but they weren’t exactly good people either.  Despite trying to help Elsa in doing so, they hid their strange daughter away from the world and let her feel like she SHOULD be hidden.  They let her feel like a monster. 

(It’s a wonder she didn’t become one.)

Whether or not Elsa (or Anna!  Anna suffered too!) ever blamed them for it, her parents were abusive.  Absolutely.  Without a doubt. 

Good intentions do not absolve abuse.

Thank you dear, for saying everything I was thinking in a much more eloquent way. <3