what if instead of killing people you got hired to just ruin their day.  like the mafia or someone paid you to park behind someone’s car so they can’t back out of a spot when they’re in a rush in the morning and you make them late for work.

i would enjoy that immensely

there is a long list of people that i would gladly do that to without payment

you wouldnt be a hitman, youd be a hurtman

Ok but I feel like there would be a huge market for this, like the Send Your Enemies Glitter thing.

How about the reverse?  Hiring an agent to secretly make someone’s day better.  Buying them coffee, paying their parking meter before it runs out, opening doors, giving them a seat on the bus–little moments that just improve their day.  Bribing the radio station to play all their favorites.  Walking past them with a dog they can pet.  Leaving a nice note on their windshield, or slipping a candy bar into their bag…

Ok but imagine these agencies exist and are constantly competing lol