ok, i’m built like a noble ox. like i am 6′1 and i am sturdy lady. like thighs for days. if you try to move me. you will be moved. body images aside (lol, i am self conscious about my size, yeah it’s life)
so like, i am very used to girls standing next to me in public places. i end up acquiring a pack of ladies. just because women are like, that lady is a lady men stay away from. i am jerk kryptonite (usually, i get my fair share of creeps, such is life) but most men have self preservation that this 6′1 ox will break them. and i will
so usually i am in my own phone and look up to another lady standing next to me. and i will immediately look up and make eye contact and nod. like, you know, that nod. i see you and you can talk if there is something wrong. i end up on a reg basis being a defacto bodyguard to these young ladies and small women while waiting for buses and in the metro.
i am a large oak tree. i protect the other birds.
ladies, we all got roles. find tree in the wild. we’re always happy to provide shelter from the creeps.
i’ve regularly said, “move on, she doesn’t want to be your friend”
I’m in love
Story time: So I’m 6’2 and “big boned” as my mother would call it. This happens to me all the time and a couple years ago I managed to get the the front row of a Macklemore concert. This woman, probably 5’4, squeezes up next to me and says, “Hey, I’m here alone, do you mind if I stand in front of you?” Of course not. So we’re all having a good time, dancing around, when all of a sudden this Bro™️ is behind me telling me that I’m too tall to be in the front row and it’s not fair. Now, keep in mind that this concert was outside, in February, in Vail CO. It was FREEZING so not only am I of the stature I am but I had my hair up and a beanie on and a big coat and boots. We try our best to ignore him but Bro™️ is drunk and very clearly thinks I’m a man and proceeds to punch me in the back of the head.
LIL SIS WENT OFF, FOLKS. This tiny woman literally moved me out of the way, jumped up, and head butted Bro™️ in the face with such a fury. I thought she was going to kill him, it was truly a beautiful moment in my life.
The moral of the story is that for every tree in the wild there is a cute little birdy who will defend its shelter to the death. Stick together ladies👯♀️
Yelp is crazy unethical. Even before I heard about this nonsense, I worked at a small business in San Francisco whose customer traffic was directly influenced by their cesspool of a site.
Anyway, my supervisor and I worked hard to make sure every customer was happy. And we were succeeding! We had a perfect 5 star rating on Yelp! It was amazing! Then one day we got a 1 Star Rating on our Yelp Page. Someone from Pennsylvania left a nasty review on our site. It was scathing.
Now, that’s not something that’s too far out of the realm of possibility for my job. While I sold mattresses in a brick and mortar, we also sold mattresses via Amazon and our online store and people from all over the country purchased mattresses from us. But I digress. The reason this is important is, well, where it gets dicey for Yelp. Because sure enough, Yelp sent us an email telling us that if we paid some fee they would push all the bad reviews off the site. They were extorting money out of us!
And here’s where it gets really interesting. My supervisor contacted the customer to see if there was anything we could do to make them happy with their purchase, so they can change their review. But the customer in question had literally never heard of our company and obviously never purchased anything from us.
Yelp literally committed fraud, and it was only when we threatened to sue that they took the fraudulent review off of our page.
do you ever see your sibling and just have this overwhelming urge to smack them for no reason? like my brother will walk into the room and i’m like “oh man i guess i have to end you”
