it really bugs me when people are like “wow this is NOT a kid’s show!” as if kids have no capacity to process upsetting or deep or meaningful content, and as if all content for children should be as vapid and safe as possible
“My ex is crazy.” In most cases not true. He is most likely the crazy one.
If he’s over 18 and not in school and doesn’t work or have a car (and isn’t trying to either) he’s a bum and is most likely looking for someone to monetarily provide for him
If you do date someone who has a child (which I don’t recommend) but if it does happen be VERY cautious if you NEVER hear him speak about his children, spending time with them, see him with them..etc… he most likely aint shit and will talk about his child’s mother being crazy (which jumps back to my first point)… especially if he has more than one with different women….RUN (he doesn’t like to use condoms and if you get pregnant it will be a YOU problem)
Guys who spend money on things he wants instead of needs…. and when he needs something you have to pay for it (like dudes who have weed but no money to eat)
Guys who ask for nudes or talk anything sexual within the first few conversations without invitation
Guys who put down other women. Like the guy who doesn’t like dark skinned women or talks shit about women who wear weave but doesn’t date women with natural hair…
Guys with the “Lady in the streets but a freak in the sheets” mentality. Normally are against anything pro-women…
If he already within a first few conversations is jealous or angry towards the idea of you talking to other guys.
So many other things but it’s 5am and I can’t think…
Most of this list sums up my college dating experience
Anybody who says “I would never let my girl (insert thing an adult should have the freedom to decide whether or not to do here)”
if they try to separate you from the people you care about
if you have a suspicion that they’re insecure about any of your accomplishments
if he says “females” instead of “women”, “ladies” or even “girls”
the first time you hear him refer to a woman as a “bitch”, “thot”, “ho”, etc and he can’t reasonably explain how that term applies, just has some throwaway answer…she probably rejected him in the past or has her own mind. He’ll be calling you that after he does something shitty enough for you to leave.
if he tries to control the things you do or own (pets , vacations etc) without actually making any commitment to you.
(this ones connected to my fist one) if he tries to make you give up or abandon something for his love example “would you give up your dog for me?” (was actually asked of me in a very sweetheart, romantic big eyed tone)
if he’s so “busy”.
if he only seems to call you around for sex.
if he is constantly trying to pressure you into sexual acts you have previously told him makes you uncomfortable.
if he tries to make you feel insecure or foolish for enjoying the things you enjoy.
if he only seems to care about you, or becomes jealous the second you begin another relationship.
(and this sorta goes without saying) has no problem dating someone much much younger than him, or taking advantage of teenagers.
etc
Just to add: (sorry if these were already mentioned)
• If he uses his “strong emotions” for you to manipulate you ex: I get so depressed when you go x amount of time without calling me
• if he says, “but I’m a nice/good guy” to get to you to do something you’ve said you’re uncomfortable with
• if he’s never where he says he will be when he says he’ll be there OR keeps you waiting an excessive amount of time
• if he stalks your social media profiles
• if he says “if I were gonna hurt you, don’t you think I would’ve done it by now?”
Basically, if it don’t feel right, it ain’t right.
if he denies things that have happened, especially details that incriminate him… for example you were having an argument and he pushes you, but later says he didn’t
if he raises his voice but demands that you speak softly or calmly
if he reinforces other double standards, like the idea that you aren’t allowed to talk to/be friends with other men but calls you insecure or crazy if you mention that he talks to/is friends with women
if he claims your personal property as his own without permission
if he guilts you into doing things for him consistently without reciprocation
if he speaks in a derogatory way about women when around his male friends, or his personality changes drastically for the worse when the room is dominated by men
